Sunday, November 20, 2005


I'm feeling kind of strange at the moment - like I'm hemmed in and waiting for something to happen that's taking its own sweet time. Strange.

This week, I should hear about what job (if any) my employer is going to offer me, after my current job was made redundant a week ago. Change has always been good for me, even when it was bad but, I don't like not being in control of the situation - maybe this is why I'm feeling so hemmed in.

The results from my last degree course are due out on 16th December so I still have something to wait for. I like having something to wait for - something that counts - something like an essay coming back from a tutor, or a submission from an editor, or a note from a friend. Perhaps I just enjoy creating expectation - wonder if everyone else does that?

So, if I create expectation on purpose for myself and enjoy it, why aren't I enjoying waiting to hear about my job? Hmm...


Anonymous said...

Didn't know about the critical job situation... fingers crossed for you... B

Messalina said...

Thanks B. I'm sure it'll all be fine - just an uncomfortable situation for a control freak like me!